Sunday, March 13, 2016

Become at peace

hi blog

Same old same old. Feeling like shit once in awhile whenever I think about it.

Reading and watching a lot about psychology, probably a very "diluted" version compared to the academic ones. I guess I should dwell in proper books in the future.

"Be at peace with rock bottom and everything else that happens afterwards will be up"

bye blog

Monday, January 11, 2016

Rest in Peace, David Bowie.

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Ground Control to Major Tom
Commencing countdown, engines on
Check ignition and may God's love be with you

This is Major Tom to Ground Control

I'm stepping through the door
And I'm floating in a most peculiar way
And the stars look very different today


Ground Control to Major Tom
Your circuit's dead, there's something wrong
Can you hear me, Major Tom?
Can you hear me, Major Tom?
Can you hear me, Major Tom?
Can you...

Rest in Peace, David Bowie

bye blog

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Renewal x Transition?

hi blog

Hah. I'm still around, surprised? I've been thinking about reviving this piece of cyberspace or moving to another blog medium (wordpress is first on my mind) for a cleaner look, but I can't bear to part with the history over here... not like its glorious though.

...or maybe I should start a more anonymous blog with a pseudonym just so I can voice out my views without worry. Whatever, don't have time for this yet.

Quick update:

ORD-ed, NUS and CEG.

Lots of changes with regards to political/religious/ethical/personal views. It will take several posts to present them out in this (or my migrated) blog. My old friends might not recognise me anymore due to the vast changes in my views/opinions about certain matters.

I might write more in the future but don't wait for me, its not worth it. Ah, and I'm too lazy to revamp the layout of this blog. December perhaps... See you all then.

bye blog

Wednesday, April 17, 2013


hi blog

Its been a while, last post was almost a year ago. The previous post was about a sad event and I feel fortunate that this post is not going to be revolving around unhappy things. Yay.

I'm in the service now, so this is just gonna be an update for my "future" self to read:

Enlisted in Hawk Company platoon 3.
Posted to Specialist Cadet School, Delta Company.
Did my professional term in Artillery Institute which had one of my best "cadet" experiences.
Posted to Mandai Hill Camp, 1SIR - the First & Foremost.

Now? Waiting for my ORD - 7 September 2013.

Time passes in a blink of an eye. I was still shouting at mono-intake recruits a few months back, and now I'm working together with them and getting them ready for their future commanders. 

Oh well, a few more months and I'm out of here. I won't say life in unit is tough, but its not pleasant. I think I'll miss my men and colleagues after all the "chiong-sua" we've done together.

I wonder how my old friends are doing. We'd only catch up on rare occasions. Gotta try reconnecting with them before I move on to the next stage of my life.

bye blog   

Sunday, April 15, 2012

You'll be missed

hi blog

Its been a long time.

Today something that I've really care about left me forever. My beloved pet lovebird passed away on 15/4/2012 approx 3-7am. I'm emotionally affected, hitting rock bottom.

My lovebird has been through so many things with me. Exams, internship, enlistment, then it flew away for a week or so and returned to us miraculously, and now finally leaving us forever after being with us and enriching my life for a short 4 years time. It is one of the little things that I truly care for...

I'm finding it increasingly difficult to return to camp every week due to issues at heart. Dad work overseas, brother studying overseas, and I'm stuck in camp most of the time leaving mother alone. Army has taken so many things away from me, physically and psychologically. Tough times, tough times, I need the will to carry on.

I really wonder if I could have done more to save my pet, or am I just ignorant? How I wish I can mourn at home for a few days before returning to camp. I really do not know how to concentrate in camp for the week. Unstable, disturbed, irritated, fatigue, is what I feel everyday. It seems that my life has been hit by a vortex of shit and unfortunate events. When will all this end? I need a break...

bye blog

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Revelation of you

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I'm starting to let cynical logic take over me. I perceive people and their words differently, not the same as before.

This is bad. Its turning me into a cold and calculative being.

This is good though. I see right through now... right through.

bye blog


hi blog

Spent the whole day out with my good friend on monday. When to beach road to buy army related stuff. I thought $20 was enough, ended up the uncle pushed us so much goods that I spent all my $50 on it lol.

We're suppose to meet up with more people for a "enlistment + birthday" dinner for my friend, but oh well, they have more important things to do. Ended up with a dinner for 2, agony. But we enjoyed the dinner, talked a lot. I was expecting us to run out of things to say and leave in an hour or so, but ended up to be a long dinner. I guess we're just spending as much time as possible before he enlist. My turn's coming soon! :(

On another topic.

I've been sleeping very late recently (its 5am right now). I've totally lost the drive to do anything meaningful. Stopped running, stopped exercising frequently, stopped helping out in certain matters, and stopping to do anything good for people. I'm tired of my efforts being throw and spitted down into the drain. I genuinely and sincerely try to do my best in organising things. I try hard to make things work but theres always a kink here or there. Sometimes, a part of me tells me that its a waste of time, but I try again and again. Now I'm just tired, gave up.